Mommy At 34

Hey, hey! It's that time of the year again.
I have turned 1 year older.

This year is a truly special year for me as it is the year I celebrate my birthday as a mom.

A mom at 34 years old!

This may be controversial to some but hey, that's what you call the wheels of fate and I had never questioned it. I supposed there are always questions of regret whether from others or ourselves.

Do I regret getting married at 32 and then become a mom at 34?

It's a mostly no answer.
Now I truly believe in everything happens for a reason under the hands of Allah.
I believe fate should not be forced.
Now I believe in whatever happens, it usually makes sense in the end.

I am definitely at my happiest point of my life. Despite it's rocky road, I am in a place I couldn't even think of imagining previously.

If being married and being a mom at an older age bothered me, I would probably in an unhappy & unsatisfied marriage with probably 2-3 kids. I'm glad I didn't settled.

Jhon and I worked very hard in our relationship (mostly fending naysers), family problems and not to mention financial issues. One thing we had worked for was security and we are truly contented to have that sense of stability, financially, mentally and emotionally while having Sarah in our hands.

It's not perfect or a text book family but it is ours.

Yes, being parents at an older age has it's drawbacks.
I do still have that same energy and childlike spirit. Unfortunately, physically, my body like to prove otherwise. I do try to keep fit or at least be energetic but days don't end the same way anymore. I do get more tired than usual. Previously less sleeping hours don't matter but now, I would be grateful to able to sleep for 4 hours of undisturbed sleep.

But it's really okay because I thoroughly know all that comes with being a mom and more ever at this age. I am still grateful because I wouldn't want it any other way.

At 34, with an amazing husband on my right and my adorable daughter on my left, I've never thought I would achieve this feeling of accomplishment, happiness and gratitude.

I feel like I am now the future Zura who can go back to the past Zura and tell her, "Everything will be okay, you WILL be truly happy and it WILL take time but it WILL be worth it"

Happy birthday to Me.


Life with Sarah (Month 4)

Did you missed it? 

Sarah at 4 months old!
By this time, I had more or less got the hang of Sarah, crankiness and all. I mean, I do get exhausted but it comes with the package so I can't really complain.

Sarah had her usual baby ups and downs. There were days when she was wonderful and then there were stormy days when everything does not seem right. Even so, I was grateful that her bad days are actually not bad lah. She was just a handful and I didn't get any rest. But when she smiled, I just melt.

Sarah's hair was growing well except for the back of her head. It's mostly because of pillow friction. She loved to move her head side to side while sleeping at night.

Speaking of which, at this age, Sarah started to have her night time fussiness. Like I've mentioned before, I had no problem with her not sleeping through the night but I have no idea, she seems to be extra clingy. 5 minutes after putting her in her cot after making sure she was in deep sleep, she would look for me.

From that moment on, ladies and gentlemen, Sarah started to sleep with us in bed.
Since I've started side-laying latch her, it's actually convenient for me because even after she unlatches, I just continue sleeping. To be honest, half of the time, I would be too sleepy to monitor that she had fallen asleep to move her anyways.

Sarah is also at her excessive drooling stage. I am talking about until her cloth gets all damp! She could be teething because she does bit on our fingers rather hard. We had been attempting to get her hold her teether to bite but that does not last long.

All the 3 of us officially love the Soul Anoona carrier. The angel responsible for this was Angie who blessed it to us and she even came over for a while to guide me how to wear it properly. We were still noobies though, constantly checking and sometimes still confused wondering how to get her positioning just right.

I don't know why Sarah looked so serious here. haha
After dinner, Jhon would be on Daddy Duty while I clean up. Sometimes Sarah couldn't wait because sometimes it overlaps her feeding time. I am forever grateful with Jhon. He is so reliable and hands on.

Standard shot after Sarah's immunization shots. Coincidentally, we saw Ayah after the doctor's visit. It was really nice to see him. It was already hard to see him when we were under the same roof, let alone now. I was happy for them to have their Atok & Cucu moment. We caught up with each other while having breakfast and parted ways.

For the first time, Sarah borderline having a temperature. Her head was really hot but body temperature was okay so we did the standard cool wet cloth on her head.

Aiyah... she was so cute lah!

Luckily, she was okay by bedtime.

Do you understand how it feels to wake up to a grinning baby?
Even though on some days I was not ready to wake up yet, it takes almost all the grogginess away as she looked up to me with her puppy dog eyes.

Sarah dislikes tummy time since the beginning but we did make it up with other forms of exercises to strengthen her back and neck. It was only now that she willingly flipped but of course at a limited time, only.

One thing for sure, she was manja as ever!

We were for sure getting used to going out by then and finding ourselves going out often on weekends. I welcome this more than ever mostly because we were always cooped up at home. I guess the only challenging thing was finding nursing rooms and timing Sarah's eating cues which she does not have any!

It was a good sunny and bright day that I had to insist in taking a family photo. Sarah was zoning out but mostly not in the mood because it was way too bright. But it was okay, we managed to get a few good shots. haha

This is got to be one of my favorite photos of Sarah this month. We visited Abg's house for a mini project which turned out to be a fail. haha 

On the first week of January, we circumcised Sarah. I know this is taboo if you are a non-Muslim and to some Muslims too. Yes, we were aware that it's only sunnah and not compulsory. It was just a teeny-weeny snip and Sarah recovered with no problem. She actually barely cried.

This was also the age Sarah kept scratching her face. The ironic thing was, she tend to scratch herself more after a nail trimming. Yes, it pained to see her face covered with scratches but there was nothing we can do because she tend to scratch herself at night. I was just glad that baby's recovery rate is fast.

The season when Singapore was colder than usual so Sarah took over my side barricaded with pillows and a blanket.

I was so accustomed to baby wearing Sarah to a point that it's my go-to choice. I also always volunteered to wear her mostly because Jhon still has his body aches while I was taking it to cover my now bigger body and additional weight for exercise.

Sarah, my little siew mai. haha 

I just love that cheeky grin but I began to wonder if it was a start to an older Sarah's signature grin after doing something naughty.

We finally got Sarah a walker. She has been wanting to walk ever since the first month. Yes! In case you are new here, I have a video of her taking steps while I supported her. See this blog link.

Anyways, Sarah is not only clingy but also always wanted to stand and sometimes it did get tiring so we decided to get one early so I can take breaks. In the beginning, I just let her sit/ walk for maximum 15 minutes because her bones are still weak after all.

Here's a picture of her first time on it. 
Yea, not having fun. hahaha After a few tries, the walker became her best friend.

Yea, on top of her excessive drooling, Sarah had heat rashes. She would scratch rather hard, mostly at night which led to scratches. This went on for a month or so. I tried all kinds of remedy and by the end of the day, powder mixed with water or sometimes just ridiculous constant application of powder everyday eventually helped.

Sarah on bumbo at Mak's house. Sarah had separation anxiety so that was not fun for anyone who wants to hold her. haha

And that concludes this post.
Is anyone reading these? haha
I write mostly for myself anyways but just wondering though.... 


Super Hero Birthday Party

This party was taken on December last year. Yes, I don't know when I will ever manage to catch up to present. haha Anyways, we were invited to Wati's kids birthday party. Sarah was only 3 months old and we were still trying to slowly introduce Sarah to the outside world; mostly to people and sounds.

When we arrived, Sarah slept for a while and actually did quite well throughout the party even though it was very noisy with the big group of kids.

Fizah and Matin was also there so it was nice to have a quick catch-up. Now that both of us have kids, it's extra hard to meet up. Perhaps when Sarah is big enough, we can do play dates. hehe

It was also nice to meet up with all my ex-school mates. I was the last one to have a kid among the group. Hidayah is already with her fourth kid! I had plenty of catching up to do. haha Cerita kelakar seram.

Aida's daughter, Mia was cute. She seems to be quite a social butterfly, talking and playing with us.

I almost forgot what made Fizah laughed in this then I remembered, Sarah was snuggling looking for boobies! hahaha

With almost all the kids! So cute and fun! Unfortunately, I missed this because I was nursing Sarah in the room. This makes me wonder if I will have birthday parties for Sarah.

Thank you to Wati & Adi for having us!
I am so envious of Wati, 33 with 3 kids and still look pretty.

Nice catching up, guys! It was fun!
Bila lagi? =P