Shepherd's Pie Singapore Beef & Chicken Pies

Sponsored Review

I've been craving for shepherd's pie for the longest time and the lack of oven at home does not help. To my sheer happiness, Shepherd's Pie Singapore came along knocking by with their beef and chicken shepherd's pie.

Relatively new and Muslim owned, they started similarly too; looking for the perfect shepherd's pie; except, they have an oven. haha Sometimes the only way to do it is to do it yourself, right? Fast forward to the present, they have thus perfected their own recipe and eager to share their freshly baked pies to all of us!

Due to unforeseen circumstances, their delivery to us was a little late but it was worth the wait. Hopefully they will improve more on this. It has been a while since I ate shepherd's pie but it's usually the UK version which does not use any overwhelming flavors.

I received 1 medium beef and 1 small chicken shepherd's pie.

Fun fact: 
Do you know originally, shepherd's pie is only for lamb filling while cottage pie is for meat filling? Now, everything is call shepherd's regardless of filling.

The pies was received quite warm to the touch and in a box. The pure excitement to see the golden cheese crusted mashed potatoes made me all hungry even though it was barely dinner time.

The pies were well compacted with the right ratio of potato and filing. The mashed potatoes as itself was creamy and smooth. It was well seasoned to a point it was delicious to eat it as it was. The only way I could describe the fillings was that it had an Asian twist. At first, it reminded me of potato curry puffs and after a few more spoonfuls, samosas would be more accurate.

Surprised by the taste but not complaining. Jhon and I thoroughly enjoyed the pies. There's something about them that we kept wanting to eat more of. It is definitely a comfort food, perfect for any day. The beef filling was more flavorful than the chicken filling and has a teeny bite of spiciness, perfect for that little kick.

Since the chicken filing was lighter in terms of flavor (but still yummy though), it would be perfect for kids.

The medium size pies should be able to serve 2-3 people depending on your appetite. We didn't finish ours (I also ate the mini chicken pie) and had leftovers. I ate it for lunch the next day and it was as delicious as when we received it freshly baked. That's definitely worth a mention. 

If you are interested to try Shepherd's Pie Singapore whether for yourself or even for parties/ celebrations, feel free to check out their website at 
You may also follow their FB and IG too!

Oh yeah, it is free delivery for orders more than $80! Apa lagi?
Shepherd's pie party lah.

Sarah's First Birthday!

It is almost Sarah's 2nd birthday and here I am posting her 1st birthday photos. I kinda feel bad but better late than never?

We didn't plan a party for Sarah's birthday. We didn't have much of a social circle and can't say much about my family when it comes to planning get together. Plus, I want to be consistent with our celebrations. We are not the kind who go all out for birthdays anyways. We usually have either a special outing, meal and/or photoshoot.

For Sarah's birthday, we celebrated at home for a DIY photo shoot and a shell out lunch, inviting my family of course. Jhon and I started the day early prepping and cooking the food and it's so leceh lah. One thing for sure, that would be the first and last time I do a DIY shell out and I am willing to accept to pay extra for the meal. haha It's sedap though.

We ordered Sarah's cake from Bob the Baker, choosing a design they already have, only requesting for a pastel purple/pink shade. The cake topper was bought from Q10. The theme of the party/photo shoot was minimalist purple/grey. Jhon had his grey backdrop, we bought balloons and a rustic flag bunting. 

Minimalist has always been our go-to theme. It will never go out of style and it does not outshine our little Sarah. I love this little girl so much and more than grateful to have an easy baby; clingy, but easy. 

When I thought I couldn't love this little girl any more, she would so random adorable things and my heart would expand in ridiculous ways. As much as I love Sarah as a baby, I couldn't wait for her toddler-hood as I know that is when it really starts to be fun and interesting. There will be more responses, milestones to be reached and truly see her character and personality spring to life.

We tried to do a cake smash but it's a fail because Sarah is a cautious baby and not reckless at all. She loves to investigate or analyze before going all gung ho to anything she sees. I like that about her. hehe It also has a silver lining because we don't have to clean up a mess and to be honest, Jhon has a pet peeve with a messy or dirty eater. A cake smash would probably disturbed him rather than thinking it's adorable. haha

Of course, Mama must join it even though Papa didn't want to only because he is in photographer mood and wearing home clothes. I told him, he may regret capturing the day together but oh well! He said he is happy using his phone. bluek 

Behind the scene shots aka test shots

She looks just like me when I was a kid in this shot! urgh!

And that concludes the end of the the post. I am so backdated with my posts with Sarah and I am wondering should I just post them as a Blast to the Past kind of thing. One thing for sure, I have to really commit  and be consistent so I can be up to date ASAP. We shall see! I just love looking and reading back my posts and reminisce through blog more than other social medias.

Baby Blues, Depression & Anxieties

This is not a call for help nor seeking for attention. This is to share that what most moms are experiencing are real and I am here to share my story. This might be a trigger to some so read with caution.

Back story: Without indulging too much information, know that I do have a history of depression and anxiety that was unfortunately not diagnosed. I supposed just like most people, we sometimes dismissed it as being 'too emotional/ moody' and try to 'get over it'. 

I did overcame depression after knowing Jhon. The thing is, I feel that we can never really get over the trauma or depression. It will always be there; simply locked in a room, in a little corner, just waiting for the right key to open it again.

[Image Source]

So when I was at my final trimester in my pregnancy, I did dread and wonder if post-natal depression would be that 'key'. Don't get me wrong, I wasn't expecting or getting ready to have it. I did try thinking positive thoughts, focusing 1 thing at a time and all that jazz but clearly, it was futile.

Baby blues hit me first. To be honest, initially, I didn't realized I had it. I thought I was just being tired. I thought I was just in pain and focusing on trying to get well. It was days later when I was at home and alone with Sarah, I didn't have that warm connection mothers "should have".

When I looked at Sarah, I somehow cannot make sense that she just came out from me; that she was MY baby. I barely took photos of her and although I made a fuss of her such as feeding and such, it was only because I knew it was my responsibility. When I looked at her, she was a baby I had to take care and love but not necessarily MINE to. 

2-3 weeks in, I was getting better. I moved around more, but slowly, the feeling of dread crept in. I was struggling with breastfeeding. I was physically and mentally tired. I was already struggling as a first time mom and my surroundings was not a relaxing one. Imagine barely getting yourself together and someone is using you as a psychologist to dump stress on. 

Yes, I started to think suicidal thoughts again. I even joked about throwing Sarah away as a punishment for not sleeping well but I was a tiny bit serious about it. I was not in a good state of mind and thinking back, I still feel bad.
I was not okay.

On top of that, I also started to wake up with breathlessness; it felt as if I had stopped breathing and would wake up from deep slumber frantically gasping for air. I would cough viciously with bouts of nausea. I would sometimes feel light-headed or dizzy. These episodes were actually nothing new as I had experience this countless of times before. Back then, I didn't connect it to anything. To me, my body was doing that weird thingy again.

Jhon knew the comings and goings throughout my confinement but he didn't knew how deeply it affected me. He had been nothing but fantastic; being a great, hands on dad and husband.

It was only that 1 night out of many, he caught me inaudibly crying inconsolably. I eventually told him about my sinful thoughts and expecting him to think I was a horrible person. Of course, he didn't and insisted I ended my confinement early (barely reaching 44 days) and headed home. I refused at first but after I got to go out to send Sarah for her 1st month immunization and had a trial independent run/ stay back at our house (without outside help), I felt so much better. 

Being out of a negative surrounding helped a lot with my depression. Unfortunately, my random nights of breathlessness and dizziness wakes were still active even after the confinement and went back to our place. It would happen 3-4 times a week and it would got so bad until I felt numbness on my limbs. 

I eventually looked up my symptoms on the internet and the diagnosis for anxiety was plastered all over it. Of course, I was in utter denial and this continued until my post-natal check up with my gynae. Jhon insisted I brought it up to her and she confirmed it; post-natal anxiety, the unspoken cousin of post-natal depression. She naturally, recommended me to a psychologist and Jhon agreed. 

Now, here's the thing. 
I was skeptical about psychologists; I even told my gynae about it.
It's like what are they going to say that I don't know? 

Think positive thoughts. 
Take 1 step at a time.
Get over it.
Surround yourself in a good environment.
Eat healthy.
Don't think about it.
Pick a hobby. 
Talk about your thoughts and feelings.
Bla bla bla. 

My doctor and Jhon simply nudged me in a comforting way to just give it a try. I told Jhon I would try 1 appointment and if I find it crap, I am done.

It turned out that my first consultation was just an intro and analysis of my situation. It was 2 hours long of me sharing whats going on in my brain. Of course, the water works came like a tsunami and I was glad Jhon was with me as my support system. I went to the root of my problems and declared I don't want to be on medication as I had a bad history with them. 

Oh and nobody knows about this consultations except for Jhon (now, you all know lah). I feel it's always hard to explain to people who are either not empathetic or had never experienced bouts of uncontrollable emotion; especially more the elders. People just dismiss us thinking we are weak or there are people who are in worse situations and we are being dramatic.

But that's not fair.
Just because there are others who had suffered more, does not mean our pain is not valid. 

Anyways, I ended up having 3 more consultations with my doctor. She just knew the right words to say. She learned and understood how my brain works and speak in a "language" I understand.
Logic and harsh truth. No hippie positive crap. 

The reason it ended at 3 consultations was because it was getting too steep financially but mostly because our last consultation was a heavy one. I spent a good amount of time needing to process what she said and trying to apply it to myself. I knew it would take time and I didn't want to keep coming back with nothing much to say.

Oh, and those decades of being gassy, nausea and dizzy spells? It was all anxiety based. Apparently, it was so bad, it affected my health. It totally made sense why I miraculously stop having those symptoms after I quit my job those many years ago. 

Anyways, after my consultations, my hives and/or anxiety attacks which I always get 3-4 times a week slowly subsided. I do get them but at least it's once every few months when I get stressed.

[This was drafted many months ago and as I type now, I am happy to say I don't get my hives anymore. I can't say the same with the anxieties though but being aware of it helps with coping it]
So.... yeah. That was my story. Perhaps some of you can relate while others think I am being overly dramatic. Say whatever you want because again, that does not mean my feelings are invalid. I strongly suggest to seek professional help even a little if other forms of healthy coping does not help.

I am okay now; in a general sense of it.
Sometimes, I am not and that's okay too.
If caring too much is a problem, I rather be that way than being heartless.

Life with Nur Sarah (Month 11)

Time for blast from the past!! I mean, I had started documenting Sarah's entire year monthly and I was just left with 1 more month before she turned 1 year old before I went MIA for a while due to technical difficulties.

Don't worry, I won't continue monthly updates after 1 year old. I only do the first year because it has the most changes physically, mentally and emotionally. Alamak, looking back at these photos are making me feel so nostalgic. Sarah tak ada gigi and only started teething!

I was getting more and more confident going out with Sarah more besides going out nearby. Anxieties aje. Looking back now, ya, I could tell I was being silly. Sarah was and is still an easy baby to deal with. I just worry too much.

Muka masam baru bangun tidur.

I remember this shot. I started to exercise again and with hijab for the first time. It was great and it was a plus point as Sarah and Jhon was there to 'cheer' me on.

ROC packages. She was always keen to 'help'. Fast forward to 1 year later, she knows where the packages should go.

I still love taking photos of her sleeping back then.

This commemorates the day Sarah's hair was long enough to do pig tails. It looked funny, cute and weird at the same time. hahaha The next series of photos were mostly of Sarah in her stroller as we go to Mak's place. It's definitely easier compared to carrying her on the baby carrier as Sarah was definitely growing heavier.

I just love hand me downs, even more when they are books!
Sarah loves books, can you tell?

These photos were taken when we accompanied Jhon to renew his SPass. Sighs, His PR application still in limbo.

This was the moment I was amazed with Sarah's self-control. She could stroll up and down Toys'R'us without demanding or even asking for anything. She would pick or touch something and put it back down. I could not say the same for Jhon though.

Okay, I remember this as a swimming trip but don't remember where. I definitely joined on this one or there would've have photos there.

Advanced birthday gift from her Papa because he got too excited when he saw Sarah enjoyed playing with this one the other day.

Wet towel on head always means on coming fever. Yes, I always detect fever very early as in low-grade fever so I can monitor her. This way, her fever never got worse.

The day we welcomed Azril Zidan! Look at Sarah's face. hahaha

This was the period we were obsessed with going to the arcades more than usual just like our dating days. I think it helps release our steam and desire of dating before Sarah was born. haha

Look at that face.

This was the time Sarah started to sprout her teeth. Late in the game as most kids get their first tooth at about 9 months I think if not earlier. I don't mind though, less stress on teeth maintenance, at least not until at a later age. The only thing was, her teeth would sprout in pairs or multiples. Fortunately for us, teething period was not that bad for us.