We are the broken hearted...

I came across this and it hits close to the heart. I've always believed in doing good even others does bad to us. It has always annoyed Jhon especially after seeing me cry from sadness and heartaches, I still want to do the right/good thing for the ones who cause it.

He tends to say "Why you care so much when they don't care for you?"

I know he means well. At least he understands my intentions while I understands his protectiveness. Well, a lady beautifully wrote what I've always believed in and also justified it in way I did not considered. I shared it to him, Fizah, my closest friend and now to all of you.

It's slightly long but worth the read.

[written by instagrammer: mysyahadah]

We are the broken hearted.

 Betrayal, oppression, deception, whatever it may be that happened to us; the result is the same, a broken heart at the hand of a human. A broken heart that feels like it can never be fixed, and it was entirely someone else’s fault.The next time we begin to feel this immense and absolute anger towards the person who has harmed us, let’s make that shift, and forgive.

Forgive the one who has wronged us not because that person deserves it; rather, forgive them as a sign of gratitude to Allah for making us the oppressed and not the oppressors. There is no sin in being the oppressed; rather, Allah tells us that He is with the one who has been wronged and is constantly answering their Dua.

Understand that you are not the oppressor in this situation only because Allah has blessed you with His Mercy. Every soul has the ability to wrong others, every soul has the ability to be the oppressor, and Allah’s mercy prevents that.

Forgive as a statement that says,
‘Oh Allah I’m not forgiving them for their own sake, rather I am forgiving them as a sign of gratitude to You for steering me clear of those desires.I’m forgiving them out of my love for You. I’m forgiving them because I know You love it when a slave of Yours is merciful to others and I want to be of the ones that You love. My desires tell me to wish evil for them and to hold this grudge, but I put You over my own desire and I forgive them.’ 

Pray for those who hurt you. Pray for those who do not accept you. Pray that they realize their wrongs before they face their Lord. Pray that no one ever has to go through the same thing you did at the hands of this person. Love the brothers and sisters who have hurt you for the sake of Allah, because love is the only emotion that is strong enough to penetrate a hardened heart, but know it will take time. Perhaps years, but you will be a better person because you chose to take the higher route: Forgiveness.

It is not something that we do for others, it is something that we do for ourselves.To release ourselves from hatred and revenge. Those whose hearts are filled with hatred will never find peace and those who cannot find peace will never be happy.

Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir Dan Batin, semua!


DIY Duit Sampul

Duit Sampul which means money envelope during Hari Raya is always a must. Honestly, speaking, I don't really give much thought on it's design because 1) I just don't for no reason 2) Mom always has plentiful. So mostly, I used whatever she has bought.

But if you ask me, I prefer the simpler or classy types of designs and nowadays, it can be hard to find and not to mention, mahal. So I figured, I would make them instead.

I always have plenty of wrapping paper with me (because I have an obsession of wrapping gifts although I am sub-par) so I just grabbed the left overs, looked up in YouTube for a decent and simple origami envelope instructions and voila!

By the way, the wrappers I usually get sells 3 sheets for $1 and some designs are pretty decent. With half a sheet, I managed to get 9 envelopes. It took me a while to get the right size for my own liking but other than that, it was easy-peasy man! You don't even need glue. I had always preferred to have small money envelopes because I like to give money discreetly. It fits snugly in my palm for that perfect salam and pass money maneuver like discreet tipping.

You can use square sized paper or rectangle. It depends the shape you want. I did mine slightly rectangular and when folded, its about 10cm x 4cm. Fold the money in 4 and slot it in.

Here's the video I referred from.


Running, Running, As Fast as I Can.

So what has happened to my "Learning how to run" regime that I started 4 months ago?

It was a fail.

Before you judge and laugh at me for being so gung ho for nothing, bear in mind, I am never a runner as mentioned before so it's not really a surprise the regime to kononya to eventually run a minimum of 5K continuously was a flop.

Truthfully, I really tried my hardest to push myself and Jhon to be committed.
Unfortunately, as weeks passed, it had been raining and Jhon's back aches got worse due to the impact as he runs.

I would've continued on my own but running at night alone was a no-no.

BUT! although I am no longer committed to the regime, I am still running/ jogging but now at my own pace and availability. I managed to hurt my back 2 months ago  and the pain still lingers until now but it goes away when I jog it off.

For 2 whole months, I ran/ jogged/ walked 3 times a week for about 2+/-km at 4pm. My stamina improved but unfortunately, social anxiety is still dominant because as soon as someone joined in the track, I lose my focus and get kekok. But no matter what, I told myself, I have to clock in that 2km, does not matter if it was slow or fast.

Now that it's fasting month, I had to put it on hold.

I shall persist not only because I want to gain stamina or easy my back pain but also...

Wedding Hurdle 1 : Location

I have not been posting wedding topics for quite sometime but that does not mean it has not been on our minds and had stop researching. This is one of the perks of having plenty of time; can relax a bit.
But the main reason we are slowing down is that we had encountered obstacles, what we like to call, a hurdle. Something we had to overcome to reach the finish line which is pretty common when having big plans so here I am sharing ours.

[pretend my head and body match okay? it's photo shop from a darker skinned couple lol]

As we progress, I will edit the animation too and share the updates. I figured it would make the post more animated (no pun intended)

First hurdle:

We are still undecided on wedding location. Cakap senang to throw in locations but trying to balance the pros and cons can be challenging due to many factors. I feel that I can't really focus on other vendors until this is confirmed.

At this point of time, a Gurame wedding is a little far fetched especially for a small wedding. Those ladies who had requested for me to share the quotations know what I am talking about.

The standard wedding under the block also has its shortcomings.

Bridal room issue: 
I share my room with my mom and its a freaking mess in terms of there was never a proper place to keep our stuff even if we tried. Furniture is old and it will need a major overhaul. I don't mind getting new ones but I will be staying in a new home and it makes no sense to pay for 2 sets of bedroom furniture.

Budget issue: 
As mentioned before, I have no problem with under the block wedding but we want it to be a small wedding. With mata keranjang from the both of us, I worry, it will end up a big one with big pelamin, lots of deco and food just because it suits. Self constraint is difficult here.

Family issue: 
Frankly speaking, this is the most private and heart breaking issue of all. You might think having divorced parents may complicate situations but trying having married parents who can't stand sharing the same air. The situations I had to deal every other day is so stressing (worst on special occasions) but it is what it is. If they can't stand being in the same room, what about an entire day in each other's presence and especially having to take photo with us at the pelamin? I know what you would say, mesti kerana anak they will set aside their differences but the hole they had dug is way too deep. Anyways, I rather have a short form version of a wedding to avoid as much drama as possible.


Another possible location we are are considering is a nikah at a mosque and then a small walimah (shortlisting Charisma D'Venue). This also has it's shortcomings but I suppose less compared to the above.

Bridal issue:
A proper place to berdan-dan is an issue but at least it's limited to the eyes of the make up artist and maybe the photographer if I manage to organize the room well enough. At least there are no visitors wanting to see the bilik pengantin because everyone is supposed to be at the mosque. Perhaps I can use Jhon's place which is actually my uncle's house that happens to be only a few blocks away but leceh sikit.

Piety issue:
This is more of a self issue/ reflection more than others. I feel it would be hypocritical to solemnize at a mosque but we still have not get our prayers in check, especially Jhon who is still learning it. Good news is that it's a problem that is fixable in due time.

Transport issue:
Although 99% of my guests have their own transport, most of Jhon's guests do not. Especially if they wish to witness a Muslim solemnization for the first time, we need some sort of transport to bring them from the mosque to the walimah venue. Basically, it's extra cost lah. But then again, renting a small mini bus should not be an issue, I guess?

Walimah issue:
At this point, Charisma D'Venue is the most appealing place for a walimah for us compared to Lagun Sari, Desa Kartika etc. We had not officially survey the food/place and will do so after Ramadhan. Unfortunately, the last time this place was brought up for conversation sake months ago with Mom, she cried because she was sad that I am not having the "big" wedding like my 2 older siblings. 

But at least I can have a shorter wedding ceremony and hopefully less kecoh. 
Shake hand, hooray-hooray and dah. 
I figured to avoid regret having a "over the top" ceremony, I will have a "over the top" photo shoot with sanggul setinggi gunung etc. lol 

Ideally, this hurdle should be overcome next month or so IF surveying passes. If not, don't know where else to have our walimah that we like.

We overcame the hurdle! Click here to read more.


Klarity™ Lasertox™ Slim Up Mask

If you had read my first Klarity's product review post [here], here's my review on their second product that was sent together which was the Klarity™ Lasertox™ Slim Up Mask.

Jealous of other ladies who have a smaller V-line chin? Distracted with your double chin while taking a selfie? Well, the Slim Up Mask basically aims to not only firm and lift up your chin but also slims it.

With just 2 steps, you may achieve the smaller chin you deserve.

The consistency of firming cream was smooth and application was easy. It smelled nice and to me, the cream was more than enough for my face. After applying and massaging, I don't know if it's me or not but there was a minimal heaty sensation.

I was doubtful at first with the hydrogel's stretching ability when I was about to put on my cheek and chin but it was a snug fit. The cooling sensation of the gel helped overcoming the heaty sensation. 30-40 minutes may seem to be long but I suppose wearing it while watching your favorite TV show would make it a breeze.

Unfortunately, this mask does not promise immediate results in fact, it says that for optimum result, use firming cream with lift up patch every day for the first 2 weeks and at least 1-2 times a week continuously.  For $10 per mask everyday for first 2 weeks can burn a hole in your pocket.

For thrifty people like me, I suppose you can splurge on the mask once in a while with a relaxed regime which leads to a slower result. But then again, slow is better than zero right? 

Go to www.klarity.sg for more details.